Chicken Poop for the Cat Lover’s Soul

I was scooping out the litter box today. Actually I was scooping out the litter boxes today. We have three cats and three litter boxes. It seemed equitable at the time. For a time we had three boxes and only two cats. That just wouldn’t do. One of the litter boxes was unloved (so to speak). I left town for a couple of days and rather than throw out a perfectly good litter box, my wife procured a new cat. Problem solved on her end.

Since my wife accepted a promotion to “mother to be” I have been doing the scooping of the litter boxes. It gives me a lot of time to think. I have to think about something other than what I am doing… But I can’t. So I think about what I am doing. I have come up with an experiment that I intend to try soon.

Here is what I intend to do:
A: buy a bag of cat food
B: empty contents into another container
C: label container “CAT FOOD”
D: feed cats normally
E: scoop out litter boxes carefully placing cat feces in the food bag
F: place label on food bag “POO”
F: when food bag labeled “POO” is full before food container labeled “CAT FOOD” is empty scream loudly, “I knew it!”
G: throw food bag labeled “POO” in trash can

My hypothesis is that the mass of feces generated by the cats is greater than the food consumed for a given period of time. If true, this would shed some light on why Schrödinger used a cat in his experiments. I will post my results after performing the experiment.

Another oddity with our cats occurred today while I was scooping. I finished scooping out one litter box (here after referred to as Box A) and began scooping out another litter box. I will call this one Box B. While I was scooping out Box B, one of our cats walked into and began to use Box A. Our relationship is currently such that neither of us finds this uncomfortable. Actually, I do find it a bit uncomfortable. Usually I try to look away.

I scoop out the last litter box (Box C), and notice that the cat is now curious about Box B. Finally, the cat steps into Box B and rather than using it for its intended purpose he begins to just dig around. After digging in a few places the cat leaves. I began to wonder if he had buried one of his toys in there for safe keeping. He should know better than that. In his short life, one of the few things he has gotten good at is making deposits in the litter box. So he knows what goes in there doesn’t stick around. I’ll probably never know what his thoughts were.

Here is a cat experiment, that kids who do not have the means or parental approval to do Schrödinger’s cat experiment, can do at home. You will need the following:
Bread
Butter
Toaster
Cat
Stapler

First toast some bread (click here for some interesting reading about toasters). Put butter on the toasted bread. If you are hungry eat the toast. Continue this process until you are no longer hungry. Then take the toast and staple it, butter side up, to the back of a cat. Toss the breaded cat at least three feet into the air and see which side the breaded cat lands on. Biology class has taught us that cats will always land on their feet, if dropped from higher than three feet off the ground. Childhood has taught us that toast will always land butter side down. Which force of nature will win out? Post your results in the comments section.